How to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

7 Tips for Overcoming Jealousy in Relationships

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

How to stop being jealous today before this relationship parasite eats away Fear makes for feelings of insecurity. Write down 10 positive ways you'd like to respond and how you'd build your life up even better if this relationship were to. Overcoming Jealousy, and Control in Relationships reaction, jealousy and anger are not beneficial ways to deal with the situation and get what we want. as anger and jealousy in relationships means changing the core beliefs of insecurity. Unless we deal with this feeling in ourselves, we are likely to fall victim to feelings of jealousy, distrust or insecurity in any relationship, no matter what the.

Occasional jealousy is okay and may even add a little excitement and zest to the relationship. But what to do when this jealousy becomes more frequent and intense and even overwhelming?

Why Do People Get Jealous? The common evolutionary explanation for jealousy is that men fear sexual infidelity as they want to be absolutely certain that their offspring is actually theirs.

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

Women, are more concerned with emotional infidelity, because they are concerned with their children's survival and want to make sure that their partner supports their children, provide and protect them.

Today more than ever before, people are afraid of being rejected, not accepted, not being loved and worry about losing people they care for. These feelings of loss are natural. Yet, again, when thought and feelings of jealousy are extreme, they stem partially as a result of insecurities.

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

When fear lessens, so does jealousy. If you experience jealousy very frequently, here are some strategies that will help you out: The feeling of jealousy or any other feelings is not the problem, the real trouble starts when you start acting on that jealousy and let it consume you.

You can feel the feeling, but do not have to act on it. That world contains people of gender that they sexually prefer but that does not mean that they will cheat on you with them. There is a reason why they are in an intimate relationship with you. If they wanted to date other people, they would have done so.

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

So, the next time you feel jealous, accept the feelings, yet change the way you think about the situation and be reasonable and wise. Calm Down and Stay Vulnerable To love is to be vulnerable.

Yes, it is not easy, but you need to be willing to accept what is beyond your control and trust yourself to deal with the unknown. Remember, you are in the relationship, because you decide to love. It is a choice you make to love your partner and at the same time accept the risks without any qualms or jealousy.

8 Healthy Ways to Deal with Jealousy

Express Your Jealousy in A Soft Way If you feel that your partner is doing something that is making you jealous, you can express how you feel and talk to them in a mature way.

You can also communicate it with humor, diplomacy or directly as long as it is respectful. If you are humorous, you can joke about how insanely jealous you are when your partner pays attention to someone else.

Laugh with them as you say this, because it will take the pressure off the topic and will get the message across. The degree to which we believe this fear affects how threatened we will feel in a relationship.

How to Deal with Jealousy: Overcoming Overwhelming Jealous Feelings

It reminds us we are unlovable and not cut out for romance. There must be someone else. He wants to get away from you. In an attempt to protect ourselves, we may listen to our inner critic and pull back from being close to our partner.

Competitive Jealousy While it may feel pointless or illogical, it is completely natural to want what others have and to feel competitive. However, how we use these feelings is very important to our level of satisfaction and happiness.

  • 7 Tips for Overcoming Jealousy in Relationships
  • 7 Strategies on Dealing with Jealousy in Intimate Relationships

If we use these feelings to serve our inner critic, to tear down ourselves or others, that is clearly a destructive pattern with demoralizing effects.

It can feel good when we simply let ourselves have the momentary feeling without judgment or a plan for action. However, if we ruminate or twist this thought into a criticism of ourselves or an attack on another person, we wind up getting hurt. If we find ourselves having an overreaction or feeling haunted by our feelings of envy, we can do several things.

Be aware of what gets triggered. A co-worker who speaks her mind in meetings? Ask yourself what critical inner voices come up. What types of thoughts do these jealous feelings spark? Are you using these feelings of jealousy to put yourself down? Do they make you feel insignificant, incapable, unsuccessful etc.?

Is there a pattern or theme to these thoughts that feels familiar? Think about the deeper implications and origins of these thoughts: Do you feel a certain pressure to achieve a particular thing? What would getting this thing mean about you? Does this connect to your past? We can have more compassion for ourselves and try to suspend the judgments that lead us to feel insecure.

8 Healthy Ways to Deal with Jealousy

How to Deal with Jealousy What to Do: We should try to do just that when we feel jealous. We can consider what sensations, images, feelings and thoughts jealousy brings up. Does the current scenario trigger something old — a family dynamic or long-held, negative self-perception?

The more we can connect these emotions or overreactions to the past events that created them in the first place, the clearer we can feel in our present-day situation. Calm down and stay vulnerable — No matter how jealous we feel, we can find ways to come back to ourselves and soften. We can do this by first, accepting our emotions with compassion.

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

Remember that no matter how strong we feel, our feelings tend to pass in waves, first building, then subsiding. We can learn tools to calm ourselves down before reacting, for example, by taking a walk or a series of deep breaths. When we do, we can stand up for ourselves and the people we care for and remain vulnerable and open in how we relate. Once it spirals us into a state of jealousy, it may tell us to give up or stop going after what we want.

It may lead us to self-sabotage, blow up at or punish someone we respect.

how to deal with jealousy in a relationship and insecurity

We may inadvertently encourage them to become more closed off, less open about their feelings, thoughts and actions, which then adds to our feelings of distrust and jealousy. Seek our own sense of security — The best thing we can do is focus on feeling strong and secure in ourselves. We have to do the work to conquer our inner critic and believe that we are okay, even on our own. Human beings are full of flaws and limitations, and no one can give us what we need percent of the time.